the fucking word of the day

[DIL-uh-tor-ee]

adj. Tending to put off what ought to be done at once.

On the laziest of days even masturbation can become dilatory.

[glom]

verb. To catch or grab.

Riding a gentleman is easier if I can glom onto a headboard, or something.

[suhb-LOO-nuh-ree]

adj. Of or pertaining to this world; terrestrial; earthly.

Is it wrong that my only sublunary goal is to get as much pussy as possible while I’m alive?

[uh-PLOM]

noun. Assurance of manner or of action; confidence; coolness.

Bryan sucked cock with the aplomb of an Oreck XL.

[SAL-yuh-ter-ee]

adj. Wholesome; healthful; promoting health.

There’s nothing salutary about a night of binge drinking.

[dif-i-duhnt]

adj. Lacking confidence in one’s own ability; timid; shy.

There’s one simple truth about pussy: women hate diffident men.

[ih-MAH-goh]

noun. An idealized concept of a loved one.

Maybe it was just the dirty, dirty sex talking, but we always thought of each other as imagos.